My first favorite relationship tip, tool or technique in honor of “love” week is:
- The Five Love Languages by Gary Chapman
This is a tangible, excellent tool to use with couples to help them get back on track with one another.
Chapman’s book is an easy, must read but I also have a cheat sheet listed under the resource tab on my website at www.jessicabuttscounseling.com as well.
The 5 Love Languages are:
- Quality of Time-Feels loved when able to spend good, quality time with one another.
- Psysical Touch-Feels loved when touched, kissed, hugged, etc.
- Gifts– Feels loved when others give them gifts that lets them know that person is thinking of them. The gifts do NOT have to be expensive, they just need to show thought.
- Acts of Service-Feels loved when others do things for you like, vacuum, grocery shop, etc.
- Words of affirmation– Feels loved with they hear kind, encouraging words.
The love languages are powerful way to show your love to your partner and I believe necessary to find out so that you aren’t “missing the mark” by doing things that may not speak your partner’s love language. Meaning, you can clean the house all day long and while your partner may appreciate that act, she/he may not feeling LOVED. Each of us had 1 or 2 main love languages and it is important we learn to speak our partners and that our partner learn to speak ours.
Again, in honor of Valentine’s day and showing love to your partner EVERYDAY of the year I encourage you and your partner to learn each other’s love languages and start practicing them today. You will notice a change in coming towards each other in a more loving, compassionate way.
Stay tuned for Tuesday’s favorite relationship Tip, Trick or Technique.